M.R.Lalu
Never did it come to my conscious notice until recently that there had been a time, a childhood, that I had lived with more freedom than my kids do today.  Certainly, we need to be apologetic about the restrictions that being parents we constantly hover over our children. Strictly confining their world between the walls of the house, most of the parents repeat this mistake. Always the illusive idea is parents are concerned about their children’s safety. In my case, my parents blessed me with much freedom to move and play independently all along the complex dusty village patches and backyards. The moments I spent outside my living space were the moments of exploration and there was certainly the feeling of conquering the most stimulating and critical space of curiosity and with my friends, those were the heavenly days of childhood.  Not only to my parents, but to most of the parents of those days, an interesting aspect was that they rarely had any idea about their children’s whereabouts especially during holidays. They enjoyed abundant freedom like butterflies fluttering and dancing across lanes and landscapes of the beautiful village settings. When the merriment of the day was over, children snuggled into the warmth of their  homes almost tired and disheveled. When they unusually delayed, they had to face moments of anger and outrage and eruption of disagreement. Altogether, my days as a child occupy the best part of my memory.
I think today we lost the genuine moments of fun and happiness. Obviously, children have multiple options of the sophisticated types such as smartphones, video games, internet and the Google University on their table. But don’t they really miss the delight of being together with their friends enjoying the dusty patches of the village and its green and innocent ambiance and its rich fragrance of humanness elevated by the power of love and compassion and if they are in the city, at least a lovely gathering at the courtyards. Enjoying the enchanting aroma of the soil freshly soaked in the first rain of the season while little children play into the pitter-patter of its sprinkle, splashing their tiny feet in the tiny torrent of muddy water flowing to fill the burrows and the infinitesimal streams, life as a child was a magical blessing. Never would you find a child being singled out or isolated. Everywhere, to the school and back and at the temple and the mangroves, we had a pleasant reason to come together, a fantastic team spirit of togetherness learned naturally. More than anything was the warmth of friendship that cultivated a sense of inclusiveness with sharing and caring. Learning basic lessons of acquiescence, all among the little crowd of boys and girls were euphoric and healthy even if they missed a meal or two.
Today things are different. Friendship has lost its essential charm and depth. Instead it has gained a sense of artificiality; children bury their vision and health being glued to the internet. The horizon of knowledge revealed to them on the screen is luxuriant, but it also critically preserves a dark area of seclusion, misunderstanding and cynicism. This version of new friendship has actually brought damaging ripples of temperament into families. Children easily get anxious as they confront even slightly confusing situations. Though they have all sorts of tech available for entertainment, what are amiss are the friends. A child, with a lot of active friends and pleasant chitchat taking place outside their classrooms and family’s quarantined atmosphere, will easily learn the art of collaboration. More efficiently he would find solutions to the problems that he would be hit at his age. I certainly would welcome a safety net that the parents draw around their children. But the danger it brings home is terrible. Children, in all usual conditions, would forget the need to open up their mind. A grave threat of being suppressed and questioned by their parents sustains while something like an apparent surrender to the tech-world by the children for every complex thing that they face would popup and parents would fail to strike a balance between their child’s privacy and freedom and critically fail to become a good supporter. This is mostly due to their scanty contribution in the child’s emotional upbringing. The child naturally creates a periphery for securing his seclusion and would persistently grow into an anxious person frequently concealing the real problem. So the child’s tech privacy, to the extent of leading to his self-alienation, would be the most horrific development.
To my mind, what I pick from my childhood may not be the best possible solution for the problems today. But to avail certain levels of freedom to the child to be independent while motivating him to be a co-explorer, satiating his curiosity outside the firm and closeted environment of the home might be the best way we can handle his childhood. To me, in the 80s, a childhood without television and computer was heavenly. This feeling cannot be blamed. As technology progressed and gradually tore into our little minds, what they chose to emotionally stay away from were their parents. In most of the families, this could be emerging as a threatening situation. Do the parents find some leisure time with their kids to walk down the dark and dusty village lanes or at least to the park or to the beach? A weekly leisurely outing would help swipe the dust of discomfort that the child gathered about his parents or that could also be an event to unleash the tiny trash of disappointment he happened to nibble on secretively. If this is done routinely, there can be limited hours assigned for the child’s personal entertainment on the screens and parents can have no reasons to worry about his tech wanderings. Small, yet prayers with the family members with a practice of silence for a while on a daily basis could alleviate the flow of annoyance on silly matters.  Â
Between the golden days of yore to the present tech oriented life, what comes with complete earnestness is a falsehood that we need to break with a genuine enthusiasm. The myth or falsehood is that the generation swelled by the eminence of the internet and social media has been indubitably overloaded by complex facts and figures and there are serious chances for its horrible derailment. We cannot completely disagree with that. But, to the parents and the conscience keepers of the society, one thing emerges with great relevance and gravity, that the children of today are excellently blessed with the best ways of communication. Giving them the most sophisticated gadgets and leaving them to pass their precious time alone in the complexity of online contents may seriously collapse their socializing behavior. How can this enigma be broken completely? Parents have to give their children a blend of practical experiences of socializing in the present tech ridden environment wherein the child discovers the essence of humanity from real life situations rather than from the world he captured on his smartphone screens.
—M.R.Lalu